| ...a day in the life of a mouse |
|
| ...a day in the life of a mouse |
powered by SignMyGuestbook.com
|
|
2008-07-21 - 11:31 a.m. Today so far has been an almost nauseating series of emotional ups and downs. I woke up this morning with the same skull crushing headache I went to bed with. Was really tempted to call in sick today…but figured I’d tough it out. Got to work 30 mins early, was here in time to get one of the few parking spots with the Out of Order meters, drank a RockStar, took some Tylenol, and started working. My line count is good, the caffeine/acetaminophen combo put a nice damper on my headache, and gave me a pretty good emotional boost. Also, I was feeling pretty excited to be able to leave work 30 mins early, because Husband was on his way into the city for a job interview this morning. Yay to seeing Husband, and yay to his job interview. Husband just called. The regional manager whom he was supposed to be seeing today apparently had some sort of family emergency and won’t be back until NEXT Monday, and they’d love for him to come back in a week to see her. Fuck. First of all…I understand..family emergency. I get it. But if you are the regional manager, and you’re already taking the time to call your secretary to tell her you won’t be in…don’t you think you might want to say, “oh, by the way, I have some appointments today that need cancelling”. No. apparently not. It’s much better just to have people show up, and have you NOT be there. I suppose it wouldn’t be so bad if Husband actually lived in the city. Only, he doesn’t. He lives 2 hours away. It also costs $100 to fill up his gas tank which is JUST enough for him to make a round trip here and back. That’s $100 we really can’t spare. In fact, he had to borrow the money from his brother, just to get here for that interview. FUCK. So basically, that’s $100 wasted. FUCK FUCK. I’m so mad right now! Husband is probably even more frustrated than I am, because he really needs a job, and so even when he does finally get to see this woman for his interview, he has to smile, and be professional, and suck it up, and pretend like everything’s hunky-dory and wasting $100 doesn’t matter. The only good thing to come of this so far, is that now Husband can come and see me at lunchtime. *sigh* I’m still convinced I’m being tested. Hey, did I ever tell you that my mum used to call me Jonah? Was an ongoing joke between us for a while..even had a guy I used to know calling me Jonah too. Basically, my mum told me a joke one day: Jonah, lamenting his life after being jeered at and disregarded by his people, and then being swallowed by the whale, looked up to the heaven’s and cried, “Why God? Why are you doing this to me?!” and God replied, “I dunno, Jonah…there’s just something about you that pisses me off.” At the time, I was having no luck finding a job (this was about 14 years ago or so), and it just seemed that bad luck followed me around. My mum thought I was pretty much a Jonah…I didn’t necessarily do anything WRONG…but there just MUST be something about me that pissed God off. So…pretty much, I’m a Jonah. Although…these days, I’m wondering if I’m not more of a Job? I guess I’ll have to re-read my parables, to see how things turned out for Job in the end. ::: I’m very torn right now. I’m debating starting a new blog. Away from Diaryland. Also with a new name. I just find that my justmouse diary has become a place for me to whine. All the time. I have no fun, spanky entries anymore. Plus, I hardly ever update, and when I do, it’s all just doom and gloom. I think I need a new start. But then I wonder, will I still update diaryland? Make it my emotional trash can, so to speak? A place for me to vent my spleen (btw, am I the only one who has ever heard that expression? Chicken and I were discussing it the other day). And then I wonder, if I start a new blog, with a new name, am I somehow betraying the Justmouse persona? I have been justmouse for so long now…I’m not sure I can or want to abandon it. And yet…if I don’t, then will I just bring all my emotional baggage with me to a new site? I mean, what would be the point of starting over, if I can’t leave behind all the crap? So…what do you think? Should I leave diaryland altogether? Should I maintain 2 sites - one happy and one sad? Or should I just try to revive the old Justmouse? There’s probably only 1 or 2 people left who even read my blog…but if you’re out there…lemme know what you think? Also…I’m curious to know who would actually follow me over? 
|